The Vindicated Hypochondriac: June 2011

I Love Big Foobs and I Cannot Lie...

March 1, 2010 (part two...or...two soon-to-be-amazing "parts" ;)

I cannot tell a lie...I love big "foobies" (fake boobies).
I have always been a huge admirer of them...and working for Hooters, I saw (and poked at) more than my fair share. There were hard ones, squishy ones and super perky ones...far apart ones, close together ones and dangly ones. There were foobs the size of softballs, cantaloupes, soccer balls, watermelons and giant blow up beach balls. And then there were those masterpieces of faux excellence...the lovely, realistic, silicone, under-the-muscle, teardrop style breast perfections that had become my most favorite of the implant varieties.

All breast cancer is scary...but there is a particularly sinister type of breast cancer that I had never heard of prior to being diagnosed with it..."Triple Negative Breast Cancer". This somewhat rare and aggressive subtype of the disease tends to affect minorities, young women under 50, and BRCA1 mutation carriers. I think more women need to be aware that this nasty form of breast cancer exists. They need to know how important self breast exams are in finding these tumors that are notorious for "popping up" within the months between scheduled annual mammograms (like mine did). Triple Negative tumors can also be "blown off" by doctors if the patient is considered "too young to get breast cancer"...plus, some of these types of tumors might not feel like cancer or even look like breast cancer on imaging scans (mine didn't...and I credit the Radiologist with saving my life...when he asked my family history and insisted that I get a biopsy). I believe...and I am NOT AN EXPERT by any stretch of the imagination...if a young woman finds a lump in her breast, and her doctor tells her that she's too young, or that it doesn't feel like cancer, she should insist on an ultrasound or MRI...and request a biopsy if she is told that the lump doesn't look like cancer. Based on my experience...and things I have read...I think, if a young woman is "proactively aggressive" she might save her own life. Better safe than sorry.