My days had become shackled to search engines and held hostage by the big, nagging question that was up in flashing lights....
What the FUCK?
Hmmm...is it a cyst?
Ahhh...a fatty necrosis?
Oooh oooh...this is IT...the fibroadenoma!! That's all it is...I've got a simple fibroadenoma!
WHEW!
As I bounced and twirled my new little "friend" between the index and middle fingers of my right hand, I exhaled with a huge relief.
I didn't let go of that odd habit, either...the one I developed late November-ish.
I danced that pudgy little protuberance between my fingers a hundred times a day.
It may be benign, and (please) GAWD, I just know that it has to be...
but I sure as shit was not going to let it escape my radar!
I kept that sucker on a very short leash.
Vigilant with my daily assessments, I obsessed. Is it bigger? Did it shrink?
One day I woke up and couldn't find the little bastard!
Was it tired of me messing around with it, and it didn't want to play anymore?
"Come out, come out, wherever you are..."
Ah Ha!
Come to Mama.
So, I already had an appointment set up with my primary doctor...and annual checkup to see how groovy I was with the fluoxetine dosage.
He also brought to my attention that I was a couple months overdue for my gynecological exam. I told him that I wasn't too worried about it since I had a clean PAP last time, and the mammo was good. I assured him that I would catch up with all that after the New Year.
It is strange though...I usually never forget to schedule a date for such pleasures.
I'm pointing to the Prozac.
In fact, looking back, there's a whole bunch of stuff to blame on that happy little morsel of sunshine.
I got around to mentioning to him, the side effects I was having.
" Hey, I'm always in a fog, and I feel like I'm constantly fighting a bad cold. My nose won't stop running and I feel run down and really tired all the time".
What do you s'pose was his educated, doctor-ific reply?...
"Well, at least you're not having those panic attacks anymore".
True...
he was right.
I went home and realized that I had inadvertantly (on purpose kind of? ) left one of the side effects off of my list of complaints to my Doctor.
Oh well, no worries. I am absolutely 100% sure...
90% certain...
75% positive that my new lump is a fibroadenoma.
Yep...
no doubts?
I called my gyno to make an appointment for my annual checkup.
Meh...if it's still there bugging me, I'll bring it to her attention.
But, if I get used to it, I won't bother her with it.
Since I have quite the medical history of being a hypochondriac, this is most likely nothing either.
Right?
So it's "nighty night", little lump...
Care for another dance before bedtime?
